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What you're noticing is real.
Many adults reach this thought slowly, after years of working harder than everyone around them and still feeling behind.
Maybe you've been called "too much," "too sensitive," or "so smart, if only you'd apply yourself." Maybe you read a post about autism or ADHD and felt seen for the first time. Maybe you're simply tired in a way that sleep doesn't fix.
Those labels came from people who didn't have the right map. This guide offers one.
This guide is for you if…
- You've wondered whether you might be autistic, ADHD, or AuDHD (both)
- You've been diagnosed and want language for what your life actually feels like
- You love someone who is starting to ask these questions
Before you begin
What this guide is (and isn't)
This free introduction gives you words for experiences you may have carried alone, and a way to notice where life costs you the most energy.
Lead with curiosity
If something feels familiar, try asking "what does knowing this make possible?"
Differently wired
Neurodivergent brains are organized differently, with real challenges and real strengths that often come from the same wiring.
Go in any order
Skip around and start with whatever feels most true right now.
Your experience matters
A formal assessment can bring clarity, and your experience deserves support either way.
This guide follows the Wavelength Framework, the seven-domain model Erica Woodward, MSW, LCSW, developed from her clinical work and her own experience as a late-identified AuDHD adult.
Finding your wavelength
The seven domains
Seven areas of life that neurodivergent people navigate differently, often with far more effort than anyone sees. Notice which ones make you pause.
Knowing Yourself
Who you are underneath the roles, the coping, and the story you were given.
You might notice
Not being sure what you actually like, need, or value, because you've spent so long adjusting to others.
What's one label someone gave you that you now understand differently?
Masking and Unmasking
Hiding or adjusting your natural way of being to fit in. It often starts as survival, and it has a real cost.
You might notice
Rehearsing conversations, copying how others act, or crashing after social time that "went fine."
Where do you feel most like yourself? Where do you feel least like yourself?
Energy and Rest
What drains and restores your nervous system, including sensory load, social recovery, sleep, and burnout.
You might notice
Being bone-tired after a normal day, needing quiet to recover, or noise, light, and textures wearing you down.
What reliably refills you, even a little?
Emotional Regulation
Feeling things intensely, quickly, or without clear words for them.
You might notice
Emotions that hit all at once, shutting down when overwhelmed, or feeling "bad" without knowing which feeling it is.
What happens in your body right before you feel overwhelmed?
Relationships, RSD, and the Hard Stuff
How your brain shapes connection, conflict, and loss, including RSD: an intense, painful reaction to real or perceived rejection.
You might notice
Replaying a short comment for days, people-pleasing to avoid conflict, or feeling lonely even around people you love.
Which relationships let you be fully yourself?
Time, Executive Function, and the Doing Gap
The gap between knowing what to do and being able to start, switch, finish, or remember it.
You might notice
Losing track of time, half-finished projects, missed bills or appointments, and a shame spiral afterward.
Where do things usually break down: starting, switching, finishing, or remembering?
Navigating the World
Work, school, healthcare, paperwork, and other systems that weren't built with your brain in mind.
You might notice
Dreading phone calls or forms, feeling unheard at appointments, or burning out at jobs that look fine on paper.
Which system costs you the most energy right now?
Try this
Circle the one or two domains that felt most familiar.
That's your starting point.
Start your week of noticing →Words to know
Words you might be hearing
Plain definitions can make your own experiences easier to name.
- Neurodivergent
- A brain that works differently from what's considered "typical." Includes autism, ADHD, and more.
- AuDHD
- Being both autistic and ADHD. The two can mask each other, one reason many adults are identified late.
- Masking
- Hiding or adjusting your natural way of being to fit in. It often happens automatically.
- Neurodivergent burnout
- Deep exhaustion that builds from running past capacity for a long time.
- Sensory overload
- Sound, light, touch, smell, or crowds becoming too much for your nervous system to filter.
- Executive function
- The brain skills for planning, starting, switching, and finishing tasks, and keeping track of time.
- RSD
- Rejection sensitive dysphoria: an intense, painful reaction to real or perceived rejection or criticism.
- Late identification
- Recognizing you're neurodivergent as a teen or adult, often after years of being misunderstood.
Want more? Browse our full Neurodiversity Glossary →
If you want to explore further
What to expect with us
Stay with this guide as long as you like. If you'd like support, Pure Intention Services offers life-centered care in Fort Wayne, Indiana. We look at your whole life and everything that shapes it.
Comprehensive diagnostic assessment · ages 14+
If you want clarity about autism, ADHD, or AuDHD, an assessment usually runs across five sessions:
- Intake and screening. Your story, your questions, and what you hope to learn.
- Autism-focused interview and measures.
- ADHD-focused interview, plus ruling out other explanations.
- Daily life and functioning. How things actually go at home, work, and school.
- Feedback. Your results in plain language, your strengths, and next steps.
What an assessment includes
- An in-depth biopsychosocial interview. Your whole life: development, health, relationships, school and work, sensory experiences, and what has (and hasn't) helped.
- The MIGDAS-2. A conversation-based autism interview built around the things you love to talk about, so it feels like a natural conversation.
- Standardized questionnaires on attention, social experiences, masking, sensory processing, mood, and wellbeing. Each one adds a piece to the bigger picture.
With your permission, someone who knew you as a child, or knows you well now, may fill out a short questionnaire too.
Who leads it
Erica Woodward, MSW, LCSW, developed and leads our assessment approach, drawing on her clinical training and her own experience as a late-identified AuDHD adult. Our other clinicians are trained in it and adapt it in their own work. It's the foundation of care across the practice, whoever you see.
Therapy
Neurodiversity-affirming therapy for unmasking, identity, burnout, trauma, and life after a late diagnosis. Open to you with or without a diagnosis.
Learn about therapy →
Coaching
Practical, shame-free support with routines, organization, energy, and home life, built on the same seven domains.
Learn about coaching →
Assessment
Billed to insurance, and we accept most insurance plans. We answer every message within 5 business days.
Learn about assessment →
Gentle next steps
Choose what feels right.
Go at your own pace.
Ready to go deeper? Finding Your Wavelength explores each of the seven domains in full.
Your brain has always made sense. Now you have a map.
Take this at your own pace. We're here when you're ready.